Integral Relationships

Martin Ucik's webpage:  Integral Relationship 

"Hopefully people will get a sense of just how complete Integral Relationships: A Manual for Men is.  Honestly, I haven’t seen anything quite like it—it’s very impressive."
Ken Wilber - The Integral Vision




Integral Relationships: A Manual for Men (and curious women) provides a practical map for singles and couples to co-creating an Integral Relationship. It integrates the growth potentials of body, mind, heart, and soul with healthy feminine and masculine polarities, putting them into a cultural and social context. This allows men to meet women as opposite and equal partners at their level of consciousness to co-create sustainable love relationships that serve the greatest good for the largest number of people.

Integral Relationships covers:

• The primary sexual fantasy, which judges females as harshly by their looks as it does males by their success. The primary emotional reaction of fear in females and shame in males. 
• Learned gender roles. Healthy and unhealthy feminine qualities of communion and descending.
• Healthy and unhealthy masculine qualities of agency and ascending.
• Multiple intelligences, values, passions, interests, and needs. 
• Effective communication skills. Eight levels of consciousness development—from archaic to transpersonal. Five levels of spiritual development—from gross to non-dual. Five levels of sexual development—from repressed to transcendental/sacred sexuality. 
• Five levels of anima complex in men—from women as mother to women as equal partners. 
• Five levels of animus complex in women—from men as alien outsider to men as equal partners. 
• States of falling in love and how to navigate them successfully. 
• Compatibility between different personality types, including the Enneagram and Love Languages. 
• Our simultaneous wholeness as individuals and partialness in our relationships, culture and society.
• Intimacy, passion and the unconscious that form eight types of love —from non-love to Integral Love. Compatibility between partners based on their “Kosmic Address” (combining levels of development or “altitude” with the number of perspectives a partner can take). 
• Sound advice how to heal and grow in an existing partnership, when to end a relationship with love and compassion, and how to find/attract a compatible partner for an Integral Love relationship.

Integral Relationships: A Manual for Men by Martin Ucik

Integral Relationships: A Manual for Men
by Martin Ucik

Integral Relationships: A Manual for Men integrates the socioeconomic, biological, psychological, developmental and spiritual dimensions of love relationships into a comprehensive map that allows men to meet women with integrity, strength, understanding, and kindness at their level of consciousness. In Part I of the manual, the reader learns how to differentiate between the biological sex, learned social gender roles, and feminine/masculine polarities of males and females. This allows him to understand her primary sexual fantasy to attract a successful male protector and provider with status and wealth, her primary emotional reaction of fear, her social expectations, and how to balance and harmonize the opposing poles of agency, communion, ascending (Eros), and descending (Agape) that generate sexual attraction and synergy. Next, the manual provides information about multiple intelligences, competencies, values, interests, passions, and emotional needs that must be compatible between couples for their relationships to thrive. The following chapter covers developmental levels of consciousness (from archaic to transpersonal), spirituality (from gross to non-dual), sexuality (from repressed to transcendent), and his anima and her animus complex. The understanding of her levels of development in these four crucial domains is paramount for his ability to meet her as an opposite and equal partner.

"Integral Relationships" is an astonishingly complete manual for men based on virtually all the elements of the Integral model, in itself a remarkable feat. And the advice is truly sound. A great book!

--Ken Wilber, The Integral Vision

Finally, an integral look at relationships written for men and backed up with a wealth of scientific information! It is both fascinating and refreshing. If you are a man interested in relationships with women get this book and pay attention to what it has to say.

--Professor Allan Combs, author of The Radiance of Being, Consciousness Explained Better.

Martin Ucik (1957 - ) was born in West-Germany, grew up in a happy family, studied Electrical Engineering, and founded a successful international music-soft and hardware publishing company in 1982. He came to the US in 1995 with his wife and children to serve as President of HOHNER MIDIA. Eckhart Tolle trained him as a spiritual group facilitator in 2003. Heartfelt conversations in his Power of Now group and the end of his 14 year marriage led him to a deeper interest in male-female relationship dynamics. To better understand why there are so many unhappy singles and couples in the US and why finding a new partner was so difficult, he founded singles2couples.org, an Association for Healthy Relationships. In 2006 he became an avid student of Ken Wilber's integral philosophy which became the foundation to answering his burning questions about the myriad of conflicts which arise in love relationships, and why so many women have given up on men altogether. Not finding any books that took an integral approach to dating and the co-creation of healthy love relationships, he began to write "Integral Relationships: A Manual for Men", which was published in July 2010. Besides writing and studying relationships from an integral perspective, his interests include spending time with his children, reading, playing piano/keyboards, hiking, jogging, cooking vegetarian food, philosophical groups, and meditating. He lives in Santa Rosa, CA and works as General Manager for the Hollywood, CA based Pro Audio distribution firm plus24.